Not A Political Post

 For anyone that doesn't know, my sister Hannah lives in Alaska.  My sister Susie lives in Maine, so basically as far across the country from each other as you can get.  And I live in Northern Ontario, in Canada...several days of driving away from either of them, or a really expensive plane ticket.  And a border crossing.  

Besides physical distance, there are many other things that differentiate us from each other - things like what foods we like, what allergies we have, how many children we have, how tall we each are...and there are other things that have impacted us separately to make us the way we are, even more different from each other -  such as education, life experiences, friendships, relationships, jobs and of course our beliefs. 

Despite these facts, we maintain a very close relationship.  You have to know this took a LOT of work...especially when we were younger.  Like all siblings, we did not always get along...and we did all the usual things like taking each other's stuff, tattling on each other, trying to make each other look bad.  Two of us would frequently try to ditch the third, who would run whining to our Mom (Hannah - it was Hannah, in case there was any doubt).  One of us, being taller and stronger would often exert her physical strength to make others of us do things we didn't want to do such as eat a huge spoonful of brewers yeast - without gagging. (It took me several tries and sometimes on dark nights, I can still taste it!)  Another of us sometimes used her extensive vocabulary to write mean bits of poetry about the others, or make them unwittingly say derogatory comments about themselves. (I can still hear Hannah earnestly explaining that she was very  depraved - she meant deprived! - while Susie and I rolled on the floor with mirth)  But I think because we did spend a good bit of time in fairly isolated settings...and mostly because our Mom made us...we gradually become friends.  Close friends.  Best friends.  

And I have been thinking about this a lot lately.  Because of course we don't all support the same political platforms, and we don't always agree about the courses of action that our respective countries have taken lately.   

FIRST, let me quickly interject that this is not going to be a political post.  When we started Lantern Light & Laughter, we agreed that our goal was to shine hope into the world, and to maybe share some of the skills and knowledge we have been blessed with, and not to bring politics into the mix.  So I'm not doing that.  

What I am going to do is share what I think keeps my sisters and I close, despite significant differences.  

So I started thinking about this a couple of weekends ago, because Susie and I were discussing something that was in the news.  She could easily tell what I thought, because of a social media post that I liked (thanks algorithms!) so she sent me some links to look at that offered a different perspective.  I read her information and found it had viewpoints that I had not considered...but guess what happened?  I still did not agree with her.  But...I could understand why she felt the way she did and when I responded with my reasons, she could see why I felt differently. We know that our different life experiences have impacted what we understand or believe about certain things.  I did not yell at her or call her names.  And she did not block me...(at least, I think?)...and we remained close as ever.  

And that made me think about how many times these days, I see people arguing on social media platforms, so entrenched in their viewpoint and so unwilling to acknowledge the perspective of someone else.  I see lengthy threads where the conversation spirals into personal attacks and where people are seemingly unable to separate the issue from the person.  Instead of arguing for or against a concept, which in itself might still be acrimonious, the dialog consists of vicious name-calling and questioning the morals, intelligence and even the heritage of the opposing sides.  It doesn't take much to go too far...or to say too much.  At the cost of their friendships.  And worse, at the cost of family.  Honestly, as someone who has legitimately lost many family members to accidents and illness, I cannot understand how you can cut someone off completely simply because they don't agree with you??  (But that's my own personal issue, so we'll leave that one for now.)

I think as a society, we have forgotten to look for the middle, for the compromise.  And I know that word is alarming to anyone that grew up under Christian principles, but I'm not using it in the sense that you compromise your beliefs, but rather that you find a way to extend understanding and to try to see how someone in a different situation from you might experience things.  And also look at your own responses and be honest about what makes you feel strongly one way or another.  And most of all, recognize that there are more important things than being right.  And that you can win and still lose.  

And that standing up for something or someone is not the same as standing against someone.  

And that sometimes, the best thing you can do is just be quiet.  After all, no matter what any of us says or does, we don't know the end of the story.  Only One knows that.  All we can control is how we act and how we respond.  All we can do is try to act right in the current situation.

That's what my sisters and I try to remember.  And so far, it seems to be working.  

Thanks for listening to my rant.

Sincerely,

Sarah